Say "Ahhhhh"

This week Eliza had another visit with her dentist. Eliza, being the Queen of Oral Defensiveness will not allow a tooth brush beyond her front teeth and even that attempt at brushing is, well let's just say no self-respecting hygienist would count it as tooth brushing. So instead of brushing nightly, only to have Eliza vomit, we visit the dentist pretty often for teeth cleanings and gum checks.

As our gentle readers are aware, Eliza is no fan of doctors. An average doctor visit, without looking in ears or mouth and just a simple stethoscope to the chest, requires two adults to hold her down, in addition to the poor sod (a/k/a "the doctor") who is trying to listen to her chest. One visit with Eliza and any self-respecting male doctor knows to protect his groin area from an assault. As as a courtesy to said men and their groin areas, I take Eliza's shoes off immediately upon entering the exam room, so that the eventual foot jab to the groin isn't quite so painful as it would be with a sturdy StrideRite sneaker. Eliza's technique is something of a Jujitsu Groin Kick:



The dentist's office offers a particular challenge. Basically, I recline on the dental chair, holding Eliza in the Judo position known as HIZA-TORI-GARAMI (9th leglock or knee entanglement):



(as an aside ... I was on the Judo team in high school, so I can in fact perform hiza-tori-garami and many other painful moves on those of you post negative comments).

Once I have achieved the proper form of hiza-tori-garami, Joyce, Eliza's beloved nanny, puts Eliza in a basic head lock:



At the precise moment that the head lock is achieved, Lily, the wonderful hygienist, swoops in with her nifty tooth cleaning machine:



Lily is quickly followed by Dr. B who takes a good look at Eliza's pearly whites before allowing Eliza to break free from the multiple Judo holds. At the end of this invasion of Eliza's mouth (which probably lasts all of ten minutes), Eliza has clean teeth and is screaming "THIS WAY!!!" while pointing to the door.

Does it sound like a bit of torture? Maybe to some, but it is better for the moment than having the wee one gag every night at the sight of the tooth brush.

But the BEST part of going to this particular dentist is that he could give a rat's behind if Eliza screams, yells or even pukes on his floor. In fact, he specializes in treating kids with special needs who may not be overly thrilled about seeing a doctor or a dentist.

I decided quite some time ago that I was DONE apologizing to people, particularly doctors, for Eliza's differences. If it bothers a doctor that Eliza acts differently than his average pediatric patient, then perhaps he or she should have gone into a geriatric practice rather than a pediatric practice. Or maybe hang up a shingle that says "special needs kids need not apply." In any pediatric practice, children will be behave badly, special needs or no special needs. Dr. B routinely has to tell of parents of special needs kids to stop apologizing if their kids scream or throw tantrums. I am glad Eliza has a dentist who isn't expecting an apology for her behavior and who frankly discourages parents from apologizing.

Carousels

My mother is a brave woman. But she is not brave enough to ride the Central Park Carousel with Eliza. Maybe the issue is not bravery, but a reflection that she is far wiser than I am since standing on a moving Merry-Go-Round watching your kid on a pony move up and down for an hour really takes it toll on your vestibular stability. I can't really blame my mother. Eliza is not a one-ride kind of girl. Our carousel routine is pretty simple. Basically I pay the semi-creepy ticket guy who has no sense of humor $20 which gets Eliza a large bucket of rides. Note to tourists: The Central Park Carousel is one of the last bastions of cheapness in the city at $2 a ride.

Eliza's "transition" from the ride is a torturous ordeal requiring me to use the fireman's carry and suffer the onslaught of stares from the crowd. It also involves spending $5 on a blow up animal toy from the vendor who is brilliantly parked 2 feet from the Carousel exit. At these aren't some take and toss toy. No, these blow up animals are a good quality last-for-months kind of toy. This might not be a problem in a large suburban home, but in a tiny Manhattan apartment having a mini-Serengeti game reserve is an issue.

But it is all worth it to hear Eliza tell me it is "windy" and that she wants to "gallop faster."

Happy Nana Day!

OK, so, Grandparents' Day is a Hallmark manufactured holiday. It is still a good excuse for Nana, Eliza and moi to head to the zoo.

Remembering ....

First Day of Preschool

Eliza sailed off to preschool without batting an eye! She did really well on her first day. Made at least one new friend and lined up all of the farm animals immediately upon entering her new classroom. Overall a good day. The only real negative was the school's misunderstanding about Eliza's feeding protocol. Hopefully by next week that will have been resolved.

As Eliza searched for the correct elevator, she not once looked over her shoulder for me! I think a few months in a plastic box in the NICU teaches some serious self-reliance!

Smith Park with Eliza's BFF Hallie

Smith Park in Philadelphia is a grand place for a preschooler. Eliza and Hallie had a great day running with their flour sacks to the Giant Slide.

To see some video of the Giant Slide in action click here.

Eliza enjoyed spinning endlessly (great practice for the Tea Cup ride at Disney) and they both enjoyed the Teeter-Totter and the ride one toys:

AND TOMORROW IS THE FIRST DAY OF PRESCHOOL!!!

Now I Know Why Oxford UnitedHealth Group and Medco Have Once Again Failed to Pay Eliza's Claims

... They are simply too busy doling out their hard earned money (a/k/a my premiums) on lobbying against healthcare reform:

Yes, yes I too am sick of repeating my mantra, but once again: no one who has lived a life of good health with their biggest uncovered medical bill being a botox injection or a pack of birth control pills should ever be permitted to run a healthcare company or hold a government position that effects healthcare.

What has brought on my latest rant: In August Oxford UnitedHealth sent us a monthly invoice that was about $9,000 more than the company's regular bill. The number bore no relation to anything: it wasn't twice as much, one and a half times as much, not an extra person or two. Odd. So I call Oxford and after TWO HOURS they decide that they had no rational reason for this "adjustment" to our bill. So I paid what they told me to (our normal premium) and documented this with multiple letters and emails.

Fast forward to this Friday morning. I get a call from CVS.com advising that although Eliza's doctor's office had finally sent in the information for preauthorization of her formula, that our policy had been cancelled as of August 31, 2009 for non-payment of premium. Hmmm. We paid the premium, check was cashed and all. Apparently some nitwit at Oxford UnitedHealth Group had simply seen that I had paid less than what his computer showed and without batting an eye cancelled our group policy. Sweet. So after another TWO HOURS on the phone with Oxford UnitedHealth Group, they decided that yes, in fact our policy had been timely and fully paid and they conceded that it is ILLEGAL in New York to cancel a policy for non-payment of premium without notice. So they nicely reinstated our health coverage back to August 31.

While I am sure they were waiting for me to whimper with joy at their benevolence, they mentioned that it would however take up to 96 hours for Medco to get around to reinstating coverage. Not what I wanted to hear since I had a pending pharmacy order of about $700. No real reason was offered as to this delay in our pharmacy benefit being reinstated, other than "these things take time." They suggested that if Eliza really needed the pending order, that I pay out of pocket, submit a claim and they would reimburse me in 3 to 6 months.

And there are people out there who don't think we need healthcare reform?

For Parents on NICU Trauma May Last

This recent article in the New York Times is right on the money. I don't think the results of the study come as any surprise to those of us who spent more than our fair share of time in the NICU.

One interesting part of the study noted that:

Some hospitals pair parents of premature babies in intensive care with those who have been through the experience. One study found that 16 weeks after childbirth, mothers who were matched with NICU veterans had less anxiety and depression, and felt they had more social support, than mothers in a control group.

Which begs the question then, why do so many NICUs lack a parent support group? There are many NICU parents who spent weeks or months in the NICU with their children who would be more than willing to volunteer for a support group, yet there seems to be resistance by the hospitals to parent support groups.

When a baby enters the NICU, the NICU gets more than one patient. It gets the baby and the baby's parent(s). The NICU staff is well trained to care for the baby and they do that admirably. But who is there to care for and support the parent(s)? While the NICU staff can guide the parents through the medical aspects of life in the NICU and lend a shoulder to lean on, only a veteran parent can really know what the new parents are experiencing.

So why would any hospital resist having a NICU parent support group?